Thoughts I Had During Yoga

I have not been in total health for the better part of a week, meaning I have been fairly inactive over the last seven days. Between my illness and Day 4 of Whole30, I was a little worried when I returned to my yoga class last night. Here is a collection of my thoughts during class:

  • Is there a box of Kleenex in there? I think there's a box of Kleenex in there.
  • I can't breathe with my face in this bolster.
  • I hope I don't fart.
  • Oooh yes, there's a box of Kleenex in here!
  • That snort sounded lovely.
  • My arms are going to fall of if I stay in down dog for one more breath.
  • I am hungry.
  • Wearing a half-do was a mistake.
  • I feel skinnier than the last time I was here.
  • Must be my virtuous denial of cheese.
  • If I have to do one more plank I am going to die.
  • Yoga is much more rewarding when I can go home and eat bread.
  • Or drink wine.
  • Alright, John, bring on those plank crunches.
  • I am so strong. I should go running tomorrow.
  • Well, maybe we'll ease back with the stationary bike.
  • Ah yes, the reason I love yoga: final relaxation.
  • Snooooort!
  • I cannot wait to go home and eat some frozen grapes #dessert
  • At least I didn't fart.